Protecting my Cubs

Yesterday I took Jackson and Judson to their doctor appointments in Fayetteville. Jackson was getting his wrist x-rayed to make sure the fracture in his wrist was healed and Judson was going for his two week check-up after having his tonsils and adneoids removed. Jensen spent the day playing at her friend Sydney's house.

I had decided that since there was a gap of about 4 hours between appointments, that we would have Lunch at the mall and finish up some school shopping. You know, when you eat at the Mall, everyone always wants food from a different restaurant because you can do that in the food court! So, I gave Jackson money for Subway and then went to Taco Bell to get my food. Judd wanted pizza from Sbarro, so we got in line for pizza. While standing in line, a large man standing in front of us turned around and started talking to us. He was nice, but I could tell from his speech that he probably had some learning disabilities. The first thing he said was "looks like your little boy just got a haircut. Is he getting ready for school?" I replied that he was. He then asked Judd what grade he would be in and Judd told him he would be going to Kindergarten. Immediately after that, he asked me "what school?" I have never got the feeling in my stomach that I did when the man asked that question. All of a sudden the converstaion seemed weird. I just told him it was a school here in Northwest Arkansas and abruptly ended the conversation. Something in my spirit didn't feel right. I felt like a mother bear protecting my cub. I held Judd's hand until we were seated and ready to eat. I was then alarmed when out of the WHOLE FOOD COURT, then man decided to sit two tables away from us. I took that opportunity to talk to the boys about safety and then I threatened Judd within an inch of his life if he tried to stray away from me today. I am usually not overly protective, but I felt a huge need to be that way today. I know that by nature, coversation come easy for me, even with strangers. But I realized today how important it is to not give out too much information to people that I don't know, even if they are being friendly.

Later that day in the mall, I realized that Jackson was asserting his 12 year old independence by just going into stores without telling me and I would have to stop and wait for him to catch up to me and Judd. He knew that we were on a schedule and my mission was not to window shop, but to find school clothes. I noticed that Jackson walked into a shoe store that was a couple of stores away from JcPenney . He knew I was on a mission to get to JcPenney's, so I was frustrated that he was once again making us wait on him. I thought that I would teach him a lesson and make him come look for me to show him the importance of him needing to stay with me unless he asks me if he can shop around a few stores. I thought once he realized he didn't tell me where he was going, he would immediately know to look for me in the children's section at JcPenney's. Well, I quickly purchased what I needed and went back to where we separated knowing he would be waiting there for me and he would be very sorry for not communicating with me properly. He wasn't where I thought he would be. So, I sat down and watched for Jackson while watching Judd play in the children's play area. I just knew he would walk up any minute and be relieved to see me. I waited and watched for 20 minutes and still no Jackson. As I sat there, I began to get extremely anxious as more time passed. Finally, I started praying and decided to venture into JcPenney's to look for Jackson. I was worried that he would show up where I was waiting and I would not be there if he came there to look for me. I would be in a large department store and it would be hard for him to find me, OR what if something actually did happen to him???? Okay, now I was a nervous wreck! I grabbed Judd's hand and briskly walked into JcPenney's. Judd pulled his hand away from mine and I told him to hold my hand while we looked for Jackson. He ran to the escalator and said "I want to ride the escalator!" I then heard "Judd?" Jackson had heard Judd's voice but couldn't see him. Judd then said "Mommy, Mommy, I heard Jackson!" About that time, Jackson came around the corner. He had been sitting on a bench by the escalator watching and waiting for me. Part of me was so mad that we had separated and frutrated that I had gotten so worried about him. The other part of me was so thankful that he was safe. We went straight to the car. I talked to Jackson about what our plan would be if we got separated again in the future and I also talked to him about the importance of asking/telling me where he is going so I will always know where he is at and that he will know where I will be located. Wow, I really have felt like a mother bear protecting my cubs! I am thankful to the Lord that He loves them so much more than I do and that I can trust my precious children into His protection!